I'll be there for you.....

According to Webster's Dictionary, the following defines the word, "friend":

1

a :  one attached to another by affection or esteem

b :  acquaintance

2

a :  one that is not hostile

b :  one that is of the same nation, party, or group

3

:  one that favors or promotes something (as a charity)

4

:  a favored companion

5

capitalized :  a member of a Christian sect that stresses Inner Light, rejects sacraments and an ordained ministry, and opposes war —called also Quaker 

 

It's been said that friends come and go but family is forever.  Some might find this to be true, and others might find it to be the opposite.

 

Here is what I know a friend to be, and what I hope I have been as a friend:

- a person who loves you through the good times and the bad

- a person you can trust to be yourself with

- a person who will hold you accountable for your decisions and actions

- a person who forgives your faults and loves you in spite of them

- a person you can laugh at you and with you

 

To me, if I call you my "friend" then you are described by my definition and not Webster's.  I have very few close friends to me in this season of my life.  It is by choice.  Prior to my divorce, I had a long list of people I called "friend" but when the roughest season of my life came upon me, there were very few that truly were that.  It was a hard lesson learned, and yet... it was a good lesson.  I learned much through the "friends" who left my side.

 

Today is no different. I try to chose my friends wisely... I try to find people who are godly and will hold me accountable, and I them.  I try to find people that I know will be there at my worst and my best... and that I can be there for them.  I don't throw friendships away easily.... most times I will fight for that relationship.  I may not be able to save it but I do try my hardest.

 

I find the task of teaching my children what friendship is to be easy.  The reason is... I teach them from my life's experiences.  Ironically, the friendships that are the deepest are the ones where they have seen me at my worst and stood next to me... holding me accountable but loving me through my pain and mistakes.

 

I think of Becki Jo, Sissy, Jackie, and Michele. Oh... what they've endured to stay by my side and me for them. I would not be the person I am today without these special women in my life.  They are sometimes the tools God uses to shape and mold me.  He may provide the fire or He may let satan provide the fire, but God has certainly used them for the molding and filtering of inpurities.

We often think of how satan tries to come between our families/marriages, but what we forget, is he will destroy friendship in a heartbeat.  Normally the sin he uses is the sin of pride.  We are such a prideful race and no one wants to admit their wrongs and ask for forgiveness.  So when a friendship dies, withers or falls apart.. you know he is celebrating his victory.  Yet, when we allow God to show us how to forgive and love, it ruins the enemies plans and God gets the victory.

There are several friendships I see in my children's lives... some are healthy and some are not.  The ones that endure, are the ones where there is forgiveness, love and accountability.  I pray, too, my children will experience as they get older the longevity of true friendship, defined not by Webster or our society, but by God.

Reevaluate your friendships.  Are they based on what you think friendship is or should be, or do you base it on the mercy and forgiveness of the Savior of the world?